Everyone is trying to be successful but what exactly does that mean?
Is it money, fame, or family?
Success can look like different things to different people.
How I viewed success?
When I was younger I thought success was achieved by making good grades and by how many people liked you.
Yep…
I was a huge disappointment when I defined success this way.
I had anxiety and tried so hard that I burned out within a week.
Then I decided that to be successful all I needed to do was to get into college and set myself up for a life where I didn’t need anyone.
Again..
BIG DISAPPOINTMENT!
Later on down the road, I learned that maybe success didn’t have anything to do with my career or achieving popularity so I decided that maybe success was finding a good guy and starting a family.
HA!! You guessed it.
Another EPIC disappointment. Was not a good guy. To learn a little more about that check out my post Trust with My Life.
SO…
What does success look like?
Is it that guy driving that insanely expensive sports car?
Or becoming a surgeon and saving lives on a daily basis?
Maybe..
Success looks like this.
OR this.
Do you consider these to define the word success?
These pictures don’t lead to your own talk show or to a walk down the red carpet but, is it success?
A mom that spends her time at home trying to keep the kids alive knows this isn’t going to get her fame or fortune but does she view her day as a success when the kids are in bed and no one lost a limb?
We all know that cleaning up a mini van in 40 degree weather after your one year old pukes everywhere doesn’t really feel like a success.
I am speaking from experience… **COUGH COUGH yesterday COUGH COUGH**
Is success only when something big happens or can you consider the small wins in day to day life successes?
Let’s compare.
You finally got that promotion that you have been waiting for.
That is definitely a big success!
How about your child finally communicating that they need to use the potty but they don’t make it in time.
This may not sound like a success but in the life of a stay-at-home mom that is a huge step. It is a small win and a step closer to the end goal.
It is a success.
Here is a scenario for you.
You are in a toxic relationship via significant other, friend, or family member. You have tried to work it out in every way you can think of and have even reached out for help but in the end you decided to walk away.
Is this success or failure?
So many people will have their own opinions.
The person on the other end could look at it as a failure because you appear to be giving up on them or they may just be that clueless to what is really going on.
Those outside of the relationship may see it as selfish or as strength so it could be viewed as a win or a lose.
But, what about you… The person who walked away. What is your view of it?
Do you feel like you failed them and yourself or do you feel successful in lifting a heavy burden off your shoulders and now you can move forward instead of backwards.
I have been there and I am going to be honest.
I felt both.
I felt failure because I couldn’t figure out how to “fix” the relationship. I felt like something was wrong with me. I felt guilty for not only making myself start over but the other person had to find a new normal.
BUT
I never felt so free. Burdens are like carrying the world of your shoulders and letting them go made me feel like I could fly. I could heal and learn to love myself again.
The Bottom Line is…
Success is a hard word to define. It means something different to everyone and it definitely is not just for the rich and the famous.
It is for every person who reads this. When you find the successes in your life, you may be surprised by how successful you really are.
What does success look like to you?
No Solo Struggles 